Sunday, December 25, 2011

Lola Taba

Lola Marcelina, who we call Lola Taba, passed away this Christmas morning due to complications resulting from a heart attack. She is a younger sister of Lola Pen.

We called her Lola Taba because of her roly-poly frame. Always wearing a smile and bursting into laughter, she was very much easy to like and get along. However, things changed for the worse ever since her husband, Lolo Pepe, passed away a few years ago. She has been through a lot ever since Lolo's sad passing. Lola Taba has been through from mental lapses due to old age to familial disputes because of family properties. As the years passed, she eroded from a rotund and jolly person to a withered and sad one. Her smiles became rare occurrences as she never seemed to have moved on from her husband's death.

It may sound harsh, but it seems that she has received the best Christmas gift -- to be one again with God and her beloved husband and together live in eternal peace and happiness. To anyone reading this, please spare a small moment of your time to pray for her eternal repose. As always, God in His infinite kindness and mercy will surely find a way to repay you for your generosity.

Saturday, December 24, 2011


My Christmas this year isn't the same as all the Christmases I had for the past twenty-three years.

Despite being surrounded by loving family, I feel bitterly unloved. Even if I am always with my fun-loving friends, I feel desperately alone. Even if I have received many small gifts that came from the heart, my hands feel empty, trembling in the cold air synonymous to the season.

It is as if I wake up one morning and everything became so incomplete.

Am I just being selfish to silently desire for something better?

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Build Number One: Floor (Part Eighteen)

It has been almost  ten months since I was assigned to Omega. Tonight for the very first time, I was tasked to send our codes to our onsite counterparts: a process we call as building. It is one of those little things that makes me feel a real part of the team, since it is something not usually done by people who have just been introduced to the team.

For the first time in the week, it was alright for me to stay behind and wait until the task was done. I found myself always wanting to go home at the soonest possible time, but tonight was something different. I felt a sense of accomplishment to stay behind. I felt proud -- a small but very significant manner.

There are just times when people feel too down to even help their own self, but there always comes a reason for people to look up once again and see the things they almost missed.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Constitution (File 6)

According to the do-it-yourself health kiosk you operate with a five peso coin,

Your Measurements:
Weight: 154lb 10oz / 70.2kg
Height: 6ft 1.2in / 186cm
Body Mass Index (BMI): 20.3kg/m²
Age and Gender: 23M

Blood Pressure
Maximum Systolic: 118 mmHg
Minimum Diastolic: 53 mmHg

Body Fat Estimation
Fat Index: 11.6%
Fat Mass: 17lb 13oz / 8.1kg
Free Fat Mass: 136lb 12oz / 62.1kg

Heart Rate Analysis
Heart Rate: 101 P/min
Maximum Heart Rate: 166 P/min
Minimum Heart Rate: 43 P/min

Normal Weight: 141.1 - 189.8lb / 64.0 - 86.1kg
Normal BMI Value: 18.5 - 24.9
Normal/High/Hypertension Systole: 129 / 130-140 / 140+
Normal/High/Hypertension Diastole: 84 / 85-90 / 90+
Normal Fat Index: 14 - 20%
Normal Fat Mass: 22.5 - 34.4lb / 10.2 - 15.6kg

Wednesday, December 14, 2011


I shuffled my feet to the restroom as I took a break from our dance practice for our performance in the party this Thursday. It should have been a very ordinary trip to the loo, but something happened that was quite awkward.

As soon as I pushed the heavy restroom door open, I overheard two people talking to one another:

"Alam mo ba yung sa Java, yung..."

And then they stopped as soon as they noticed I was there.

As I was taking a leak, I waited for him to continue what he was saying, but he didn't. The other guy asked what was that about, but the other answered something like it's up for the other person to know. I can't stop thinking that they were talking about me, but I thought that it was also possible that he stopped because he knew I belong to Java and that I might know whoever the person they were supposed to talk about. I wanted to see if he was whispering things to his friend, but I didn't since it would be too obvious that I was listening to what they were saying. But honestly, I hope it was about me since I have a secret admiration on the one who initiated the conversation. It matters for me because he matters for me.

A week has passed, but sadly, nothing seems to have changed.

Monday, December 5, 2011


Peace in seclusion
Solace in silence
Rest in isolation

I've lost my way
Happiness always
A day away.

I give up.

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Eleven Months Ago

At this very moment, the wolf has turned eleven months old.

During the past eleven months, many things have changed. I am now a taxable figure of the country, and all I ever think about is how to become a millionaire. People came and went in my life, some I regret, and some I am very much thankful for. I have experienced a lot of embarrassing things, but I also had times when I overflowed with an indomitable ardor for excellence.

But one thing is still the same: I will continue to make my own decisions and weave my own path in the loom of destiny. I have opened and closed many chapters in my story, and I will continue to do so in the many midnights to come.